![old gay men sex addicts old gay men sex addicts](http://cdn.images.dailystar.co.uk/dynamic/140/photos/712000/936x622/140712.jpg)
He is now fully reunited with his boyfriend, family and friends, as he no longer holds the big secret that was keeping him apart from real life. The person craving the sex was the shadow side of his character that was contravening his held belief system. He saw himself as not being the person doing it. He saw his sex compulsion at odds with his held self-image. I had someone recently come to see me who fixed his sex compulsion in record time. In doing so the world will open up to offer you many more sustaining life experiences. Sex compulsion is easier to fix than sex addiction but if you want the freedom from either, you can address it with some solid work. The healthy difference can be understood by asking your self these simple questions: Are you content with yourself after having sex with strangers? Do you experience a come down afterwards? Are your feelings of self-worth affected by sex with strangers? Are you constantly battling with yourself not to seek sex all the time? Having an uncontrolled compulsion to have sex is something else.
![old gay men sex addicts old gay men sex addicts](https://u2v2u3t5.stackpathcdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/a5d9a964f1a3_sf_21-660x400.jpg)
What could be healthier than that? However, sex is one part of our life and should not be all-consuming, preventing us from experiencing other things. Try telling a teenager to stop masturbating when his body voice is constantly telling him to do it. Our bodies have their own voice and our bodies tell us when we need sex. You can have a compulsion to have sex and not be addicted to many other adrenaline activities. Sex addicts don’t have this self-talk or control. You can decide more easily to do other > more nurturing things. The difference is you can use self-talk to get tired of doing it and stop. The chase for sex is the same - there is excitement during the ritual and also the same come down after. In other words you have just created a bad habit. Sex compulsion is more about habitual behaviour. Sex compulsion is different but similar to sex addiction. There is a deep need to keep moving so the brain cannot sit with unhealed pain or repeating negative mind stories. If you are a true sex addict, you are more likely to be addicted to many other things - like exercise, work, drugs, alcohol, gambling and travelling fast. It is like a record that keeps playing over and over and you can’t stop. You now feel trapped by addiction, as you know you will do it all again very soon. You are also angry for spending all this time at work and at home devoted to one final mediocre bit of sex. The come down arrives because your personal values, your belief system and your feelings about your own self-worth have collided head on. You finally meet and have sex, followed by the ‘come down’. Getting home you spend hours telling lies and being someone else to get somebody interested in meeting you. You might masturbate at work and fantasise about sex by sneaking a look at porn. You get to work and still think about sex during meetings. When eating breakfast you will look up Grindr or similar and send a wink or “hey”. You might look at yourself in the shower and have horny thoughts. One sexual thought spins into a ritual journey until sex is obtained. If you are a true sex addict you will think about sex all the time. In fact sex addicts normally experience a ‘come down’ afterwards.
![old gay men sex addicts old gay men sex addicts](https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LfvrFXETPDE/Wg7FiqhtsII/AAAAAAABzn8/n3o5VEhMXikgUhnmam_ic48xg20ikgNAACLcBGAs/s1600/BM299.jpg)
Sex addiction is like that too where the exciting ritual of getting sex outweighs the pleasure of eventually having it. In his thinking, the sex at the end of the chase does not mirror his lusting expectations. Many gay men are driven to seek sex constantly and at the same time are deeply unhappy.Ī close friend of mine wants to publish an anthology called There’s A Lot of Bad Sex Out There. Let’s face it, there is a lot of available sex in the gay community and it is very exciting preparing for the adventures on offer.īut when does the pursuit of sex become a mental addiction? Some gay men are uncontrollably driven to get sex at the expense of doing other things like seeing friends, going to movies or theatre, events of all kinds, relaxing at home and any other creative activities. Gerry North explores a different form of partying. AdvertisementIT is the week after Mardi Gras.